MPUMALANGA – Mental health-related deaths have reportedly been on the rise in recent years. According to statistics, 1,774 deaths were reported in 2019, of which 1,086 were men.
Societal norms often portray men as strong providers, and men stereotypically feel the need to fulfil this role, regarding talking about their feelings as unmanly. Most men internalise their emotions and are reluctant to talk to anyone.
“Trying to ‘man up’ ends with toxic masculinity,” said Reverend Koshane Swaratlhe from Pankop.
The Reverend added that most men seem fine on the outside because they feel the need to be seen as strong. “But in reality, the inner person is damaged, and that causes a lot of men to spiral out of control,” he said.
“We have a huge problem as men, and it will take a long time to defeat it. Men are verbally abused by their wives, and some are even physically abused, but they won’t admit it. They end up being ridiculed and turned into jokes. We need to change how we think and how we raise our boys because the results of our upbringing can be seen in their actions.”
He explained that one reason men leave home in the morning instead of spending time with their families is depression. They often don’t know how to deal with it and end up drinking their problems away.
Njabulo Mawela (25) said he once attended a men’s seminar, which completely changed his perspective on many issues, including sexual and mental health.
“I love the fact that all the experts were men, and they approached us in a way we understand. I now know that, as a man, I should express myself as much as I need to in order to heal and deal with things. I look forward to the next seminar,” said Mawela.
Thabo Monnapule, a clinical trainer at the Aurum Institute specialising in HIV and TB, encouraged men to visit clinics not only for HIV and TB testing but also for other illnesses, such as prostate cancer. He emphasised that many men could be helped if they sought medical attention.
“Men are afraid of clinics, maybe because there are more female nurses than male nurses. You’ll hear a man say he is HIV negative because his wife tested negative. Shyness is also one of the reasons,” he said.
Dr Lerato Mokgethi, a psychologist, stated that men’s seminars are crucial, especially when organised by men for men.
“Such dialogues help challenge stereotypes, gender roles, and toxic masculinity. It’s important to understand that gender-based violence (GBV) is deeply ingrained in ideas about masculinity and how it manifests in relationships,” said Dr Mokgethi.
She highlighted that while these dialogues help open discussions, they don’t necessarily change behaviour because addressing GBV requires a multi-layered approach.
“There’s a lot we can do to encourage behaviour change, such as raising awareness, organising campaigns, promoting women empowerment, and involving men and boys in these kinds of men’s seminars,” she said.
