‘One-sided approach can’t work in dealing with GBVF’ – Pastor Nethononda
MIDDELBURG – Social activist Aifheli Nethononda has called on society to stop perpetuating a narrative suggesting that men are perpetrators of Gender Based Violence and Femicide (GBVF).
Nethononda, also church pastor, was speaking at a Men’s Parliament session organised by Nkangala District Municipality on Thursday, November 7, 2024, under the theme Breaking The Silence, United Against GBVF, Men in Action.
Nethononda said what makes GBVF difficult to solve is a one-sided approach often used; where women are always on the receiving end.
“We need to be honest and deal with all matters in parallel. We need to break the narrative that men are perpetrators,” he told the symposium.
“If we are going to find solutions, let’s try to move away from that common narrative that reports issues on one gender only.”
Nethononda continued to say that experience teaches him that men continue to suffer in silence because society does not allow them to voice out what makes them angry.
“No body is speaking [about what makes men angry], nobody is paying attention,” he said.
Nethononda, also a board member of the Middelburg Victims Support Center, said he has learned that there are what he referred as “victim perpetrators”. “These are people who pretend to be victims but they perpetrate the violence, and after some time we find men retaliating,” he said.
“Government programs have nothing much to do with men, they have much to do with women and children. There is much anger that is brewing in men, and no body is looking at it.”
The Men’s Parliament led by the Council Speaker, Jonas Boshomane is a significant platform for addressing social issues affecting men and promoting positive masculinity. It also aims to foster a supportive environment for men to discuss societal challenges and find solutions.
“Gender based violence and femicide (GBVF) have become headline news in the mass media. We come across cases where women are either raped, assaulted or murdered. That has prompted the President to declare GBVF a pandemic,” Boshomane said.
“We felt it is important as Nkangala District Municipality that we should also take part in ensuring that we mobilise and influence all the stakeholders around this matter so that we do not reduce or mitigate against GBVF, but we seek to eradicate it completely as something that is not wanted in our communities.”
Boshomane further said that the Men’s Parliament intends promoting positive change where men are encouraged to adopt positive behaviours that can benefit society.
He added that they also want to combat GBVF by supporting initiatives aimed at increasing social cohesion for “stronger and more cohesive communities”.
A pledge against the abuse, assault and killing of women and children.
“I am a man. I am a male person created by God. God gave me authority to protect, care and defend women and children. To love them, to care for them and provide for them,” the men said in a choir.
“I therefore declare that I will never abuse women and children because I am a true man. A man of integrity, a man of character, a man of morals. Therefore I say no to GBV, I say no to femicide, I say no to abuse of women and children.
I say no to the killing of women and children.”
